S'mores, Tents and ... Wi-Fi?

I'll admit that I have a long list of difficult demands when I'm forced to go camping:

• a scorpion-free, flushable toilet that does not require a two-mile walk in the dark to get to it


• a shower that does not contain the word "solar" in its name


• plenty of bacon


• sandwiches that contain neither dirt nor bologna


• a bed that does not deflate in the middle of the night


• a 5 o'clock cocktail hour


• ambient nighttime temperatures that do not dip below 70 degrees Fahrenheit


• absolutely no harmonicas


• absolutely no bears

I'll spare you the rest of my demands, but suffice to say that my husband Steve really just packs up the kids for his annual camping trek with our friends – and leaves me happily behind in the comforts of my quiet house and scorpion-free bathroom. But that's not to say he doesn't pack plenty of bacon and other fun camping stuff, like his guitar, outdoor toys for the kids, a hammock and a book. In fact, the SUV often looks like an overloaded jalopy, with fishing poles and duffle bags piled high in the back.

Sticks, creeks and dogs: So 2009.

What doesn't he take? His laptop.

You'd be shocked to learn (as I was) that the national trend across campgrounds in the U.S. is to offer Wi-Fi – yes, I said Wi-Fi – according to the National Association of RV Parks and Campgrounds. And it's a trend that's being fed by the demand from campers to have communication (often where there's a lack of cell service), access to movies and yes, to update their Facebook status.

Really?

For me, even access to my beloved NetFlix, e-mail and Facebook would not make camping any more enticing to me. And my laptop would probably just get hurled at that bear who's trying to make off with my bacon.

But seriously, campers. Leave the laptops out of nature.

What do you think?